Happy people do not hurt one another. Period. If you are at the wrath of anyone’s bad behavior you already have the upper hand. If that person is your boss you still have the upper hand. You’re not compromised by the level of fear and anxiety that they carry around. Don’t be a victim. Draw on your emotional intelligence. It’s your superpower.
If they are toxic don’t seek approval they don’t have to give. This gives them power. Stay entirely off their radar screen.
Only go to them when you need information or a decision and then give them two choices. Busy people don’t want to create but prefer to decide.
Use phrases that remind them that you have their back. “I know that (X) is important to you so I wanted to make you aware that….”
Deal with your own fears and anxieties by getting curious about what’s under your initial reaction to them. Fear of losing a job or respect? If the worst happens then what? I suspect you’ll land on your feet. But the worst likely won’t happen because you are smart and not an emotional or insecure leader. You have a strategy.
Bottom line - we have to manage our own emotions for executive presence and career efficacy. We can’t control others. Only ourselves. Most of what I work on with clients is self-awareness, self-regulation and self-acceptance. If you have these everything else is easier or obsolete.
If you want more executive leadership and executive presence tips here’s a link to my FREE report: 31 Success Practices for Leaders in the High Stakes Corporate World
If you are struggling with uncertainty and feel exhausted and ineffective watch my FREE Training on Three Ways to Move to the Next Level In Your Career Right Now to 1) identify the right role for you, 2) position your transferable skills and 3) create a career portfolio that sells you before you even get an interview. If you don't know where you will be at the end of the year, you are already there.
P.S. Feel free to send this link to someone who could benefit from it. We are all walking down the same road in life looking for a hand to hold. Sometimes we must be the hand that reaches out.
Mary Lee Gannon, ACC, CAE is an executive coach and 19-year corporate CEO who helps leaders have more effective careers, happier lives and better relationships. Request a free consultation call.
Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from our team.
Don't worry, your information will not be shared.