The emotional intelligence skill of self-management is a talent that separates great leaders from the average ones. As humans we have the ability to observe ourselves from a third party perspective - like a fly on the wall. It’s the greatest skill for creating peace and building executive presence.
In that moment when you’ve been triggered to feel uncomfortable and could act on it by lashing out, withdrawing or ruminating about it you have a choice. The discomfort is so great that we just want to get away from it. This externalizes a hurt that never heals. It’s like carrying around a bag that is too heavy. And it shows in behavior.
In the trigger instant turn inward with compassion to yourself - not outward in fear. Choose to be your own big brother. A deep breath clears the space to say, “May I be gentle with myself in this moment.”
Be as sweet to yourself as you would be to a hurting child or puppy. You deserve that.
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